The good news is that this is probably the correct place to tell your story. The bad news is that I personally don't think it is right to do this sort of thing with a child. What happens to kids now, affects them their entire lives.The games you describe seem more appropriate for two consenting adults. If you were to do the things you do to your daughter to me, it would turn me on very much. The reason for this is that I was physically and sexually abused as a young boy by a woman with her cigarette. Now I am not suggesting that this will happen to your daughter, or that you are abusing her in any way. And my case was very extreme. But I do feel that treating your daughter this way is dangerous. One poster here reports that as punishment for his complaints about her smoking, his aunt held him down on her lap and blew cigarette smoke in his face.........he now has a fetish for woman who smoke, same as I do. And there seems nothing sexual about what his Aunt did to him. There have been other similar stories.
So although I do not believe you are being sexual with your daughter, or abusing her in any way, I still think this is a dangerous thing to do to a child and could have adverse effects on her later in life. Especially if she is becoming aroused. She could grow up to be submissive, lesbian, and with a smoking fetish (not that anything is wrong with those things but why would you want to shape your daughters sexual preferences? She should develop them on her own).
This is just my opinion, I am by no means a psychiatrist or anything. But better to find an adult woman or man to play such games with........There are plenty of us who would enjoy it. And let your daughter be a kid and play games with other kids.
