As for what to advise her, this is how I see it. Her smoking at this point is not much of a health risk I believe given how light a smoker she is. And some people can take up smoking and not become full time addicts, but smoke socially, only with friends or only at bars etc. But they are the minority. Your wife shows signs that her smoking is increasing and that she is enjoying it more. That, along with the fact that she has an oral fixation, means it is possible (if not likely) that she will become hooked. So if I were you, I'd ask my wife how she feels about becoming a smoker, and if she says she really doesn't want to be a smoker, I would advise her to try and stop right now. The more one smokes and the longer one smokes for, the more difficulty they will have in quitting. And there is just no way of knowing at this point if she would remain among the minority of smokers who just smoke socially, or if she would gradually become a full time addicted smoker like the majority of smokers. So if she is dead set against becoming an addictied smoker, I suggest she give it up now (of course this all supposes that she can still get sexually excited without smoking. If her "pavlovian" conditioning is to the point that she can only get aroused when smoking, you guys will really have a dilemma to deal with, one that would make her quitting all together extremely difficult and not a very attractive prospect for either of you. Let's hope that hasn't become the case). Good luck to you both.