So I waited until I had some positive response to my previous story before I posted a 2nd one. (I didnt want to inflict crappy writing on you if no one liked it) -- anyways, this story has a different character than my previous one, but this one is based on a concept I encountered in real life. About 4 years ago when I lived in Austin, Tx I hooked up with my Ex-girlfriends Roommate who was trying to kick her smoking habit. In real life, her body was hot, but her face was not very attractive. She was one of the only certifably crazy people Ive ever hooked up with - ie problems more signifigant than depression or an eating disorder - she had all manner of serious psychological disorders, and her mother was in a permenant treatment facility for Schizophrenia (or whatever the proper term for that). Anyways, what I learned from talking to her is that often times women with serious psychoses often have a penchant for chain smoking. With this girl that was certianly the case. She'd go for a week or so only smoking a few cigarettes per day, as she tried to quit. Then she'd go on this crazy binge, and smoke almost 2 packs in one night - this was usually accompanied by intense paranoia, without the use of drugs. I'd never seen anything quite like it before, and I must say it was quite enjoyable, even if breif. The possibility for a relationship, even an exploitative relationship, was inevitably doomed, because as I said, she was crazier than all hell and I dont live in Austin anymore. But reflecting back four years ago about that summer gave me ideas
Here's the story...
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Kelly woke up confused about where she was again. She seemed to be in a bedroom that smelled strongly of stale smoke. On the nightstand next to the bed she was in were two ashtrays overflowing with spent cigarette butts and filled with ashes. Her throat felt raw, and her mouth dry and she suspected she might have been smoking last night, although she wasn’t sure. She had more pressing concerns on her mind. Primarily why was she waking up naked in someone’s bed and didn’t know where she was. A strong sense of shame and guilt mixed with concern for where she was. She looked around for her clothes and found a pair of her jeans, a white collared button-down blouse and a tight fitting black sweater on the floor next to an expensive pair of dressy high heel pumps. She quickly put on the clothes and searched for her purse which was on the kitchen counter in the stylishly decorated apartment. She scanned around the apartment and found no one there, although it looked like whoever lived there had a good income and spent it well furnishing the place. Hurrying toward the door, she paused to glance at a set of pictures in a multi-frame. Looking at them, most featured a handsome man smiling with friends or attractive women, but she didn’t recognize any of the people in the pictures. Brushing it off, she walked briskly towards the door, and left the apartment. She walked past the doorman in the elegant entryway to the apartment and out to the parking garage. Once there she then spent almost thirty minutes searching for her car, which she eventually found. Then looking in her purse for her keys, she found one unopened pack of Marlboro Reds, and one opened and nearly empty pack of Marlboros. There in her car, she noticed the strong and overpowering smell of smoke lingering, as if someone had smoked in her car recently. She found on the floor four empty packs of Marlboros and that her ashtray was full of ashes and butts. It was all very puzzling to her, but she was so anxious and confused she just wanted to leave as quickly as she could. All the thoughts racing through her head frightened her, had she been kidnapped? had someone slipped her a roofie? Did she have some weird form of amnesia? As she approached the exit of the parking garage she was nearly in tears, so aghast at what had happened.
` As she pulled out of the gate, she realized she was in fact very, very lost. She was no longer in Pasadena, she looked to be in some spacious, desert town, well developed but unfamiliar. She drove down the heavily commercialized boulevard for several miles, feeling that she needed to flee wherever she had been. She pulled into a gas station and eased her Volvo into a parking space. It was early in the morning, and there weren’t many customers at the gas station. She exited her car, noticing the cool morning air for the first time, and went inside to find out where the hell she was.
“Hi, can you tell me where this is, I’m a little lost?” asked Kelly sheepishly, her bright green eyes expressing a sincere desperation and concern that she perhaps had not meant to convey.
“You’re just north of Scottsdale, where are you trying to get?” Said the old man behind the counter, eyeing Kelley’s shapely curves with a deep stare.
“Scottsdale?!.... uh… I guess Im trying to get to Pasadena.” Kelly spoke with her voice wavering with concern.
“Well, that’s a good long ways away little lady.” Said the old man, taking a deep drag on a cigarette he had been smoking.
“Yeah… I guess so.” Kelly said, as she started towards the door. Then the seductive smell of cigarette smoke hit her in a way it never had before and made her pause. The sight and smell of the man’s cigarette triggered something in her mind, but she couldn’t quite grasp it.
“What day of the week is it?” Kelly inquired turning around at the door to face the old man again.
“Sunday, sweetie” The old man wheezed as he exhaled another cloud of smoke.
“Thanks” Kelly headed out the door back to her car.
Kelly went sat in the drivers seat and she nearly broke down crying. She knew she had previous episodes, waking up in an unfamiliar bed after a night going out drinking, but she knew lots of people that had that experience. And even though it had been with increasing frequency, she had always been at least in a city that was familiar to her. And usually she could ascertain where she had met the guy, and remember what bar she had gone too. But she had seen a psychiatrist about these recurring blackouts in memory, and she had a prescription for the anti-psychotic Zoloft. She also had struggled with depression off and on since high school, and had a prescription for Prozac. She had sought psychiatric treatment for these amnesia episodes before, and they had assured her the Zoloft would take care of it. Besides, she had always told herself, lots of people got drunk and woke up in strange places, sometimes even frequently. The situation had never been this weird.
But this situation was so drastically different, hundreds of miles from home, in a place she had never been. She couldn’t remember anything from Saturday, or anything from Friday night. What the hell had happened to her? Just then, she came out of her trance, and exhaled a long plume of smoke. Surprised, she noticed she had a lit cigarette in her hand resting on the steering wheel of the car already half smoked. This shocked her, because she didn’t smoke. She had never really smoked in either high school or college, and in the three years since graduation she had never really smoked. She didn’t even think she owned a lighter. She looked at the cigarette and threw it out the window of the car. The cigarettes everywhere in the car had to be a sign of something. Four empty packs?! She thought to herself. Two more packs in her purse. She also found a simple and elegant silver Zippo lighter in her purse, which she didn’t recognize. Engraved onto the face of the lighter was the word “rose”. For a minute she felt woozy, like some kind of a flashback. She knew the word rose on the lighter was a name, and somehow she felt it was her name. But that didn’t make sense. She didn’t even know anyone named Rose. This was all so messed up. She felt lost and alone. She tried to get herself together and figure out what was going on.
She first looked into her shoulder bag where she had all her business papers and the laptop she used for her job as a realtor. She thought to herself, perhaps she had taken a business trip to Arizona and then had an amnesiac episode. She flipped through her daybook she didn’t find any unfamiliar names, or any addresses in Arizona. No clues to why or how she would have come to Arizona this weekend. She then checked her cell phone, scrolling through her call list memory, where she did find something intriguing. She found several different calls to unfamiliar numbers from an unfamiliar area code. She knew she would have to use these numbers to figure out what happened, but she didn’t have the courage to call right now. She just wanted to go home. She scrolled to her roommates number and called.
“Hey, Trish, its Kelly.” Kelly said, secretly worried in the back of her mind that her roommate wouldn’t answer the phone.
“Kelly! Where are you? We’ve been worried about you! I called your mother and she said she didn’t know where you were either? What’s going on?”
“I’m in Scottsdale.” Kelly said, hesitantly.
“Arizona?! What the hell are you doing there? Why didn’t you call anyone? Nobody has heard from you since Friday when you left for work.”
“I uh, Im sorry I forgot to call. I uh… had a …uh…. Business trip…. It came up at the last minute. Sorry I didn’t call.” Kelly said, hoping her weak lie wouldn’t be too transparent.
“Oh, ok. Sounds weird, but whatever. We were just so worried about you and no one had seen you. We had called the police to file a missing person report, but they told us you’d have to be missing for longer before they could proceed. I better have your mother call the police and cancel it.”
“Im sorry I caused so much trouble.” Kelly said somberly
“Its ok girl, I’m just glad your safe. When are you coming home?”
“Uh… later today… I’ll be back by this afternoon.”
“Good. Are you sure your OK Kelly, nothing weird happened on the business trip?”
“Well… sorta… but we’ll talk about it when I get home. I’ll see you this afternoon or evening.”
“Ok. Keep your cell phone on and call if you have any problems. Call if you need anything at all.”
“Thanks Trish.” Kelly sighed and ended the call.
Kelly sighed and looked around the car again. This whole situation was so weird she didn’t even know where to begin, other than to drive home. She figured she should perhaps go see her psychiatrist again and tell her about this episode. She didn’t seem to be missing any of her possessions, so she didn’t suspect some theft, but she could never be too sure. But before she left town, she felt she needed to at least look into what was going on here. She decided to get something to eat, have a cup of coffee and try to figure out what she could do before headed back to Pasadena. She drove down the road to a diner and sat in the old seats, grabbing a newspaper to peruse while reflecting on this situation. She ordered a plate of scrambled eggs and coffee, and absently flipped through the newspaper lost in thought. She again slipped into a trance-like stare into the newspaper, as if staring into nothing. She wondered about the cigarettes, and the lighter. She wondered about the name Rose and what it meant. She thought for the first time about her business attire she had worn to the realtors office on Friday. Where were those clothes? For that matter where was her bra and panties? She had been in such a hurry to leave this morning, that she just put on the jeans, the white button down blouse and her close fitting black sweater without underwear since she couldn’t find hers. Then she thought for a minute about her shoes, and looked down at them, they looked different. Looking at them again, she realized she didn’t think they were hers. She slipped the pump off her foot and looked at the brand name inside. Manolo Blahnik. A damn expensive shoe, that she had never owned before and never recalled purchasing. Had she purchased these outrageously expensive shoes and just forgotten about it? She slipped her bare foot back into the stylish and expensive shoe and continued to wander in thought. She wondered about the numbers in her cell phone and most of all she wondered about the apartment. Who’s apartment was it? Did she know the person there? Should she call him or her? She couldn’t decide where to start first.
Again she looked down, and saw that she had a lit cigarette in her hand held over the ashtray on the table. What did this mean? These cigarettes were significant, but she didn’t know how. This was the second cigarette she had unconsciously started smoking this morning, and something told her that she had probably been smoking this whole weekend. The four empty packs of Marlboros in her car certainly suggested it. She sat there, disturbed, with the cigarette still cradled in between her fingers. She decided to finish the cigarette this time, and consciously took a long drag. She found herself surprised at how natural and reflexive it felt. And she was more surprised at how good it tasted, and how good that smoke felt in her lungs. She had always disliked smoking before, but this was completely different. Almost like a revelation of how pleasurable it could be. She took another drag off the cigarette, and again filled her lungs with the delicious smoke. Again, the sensation of calm washed over her and she felt in her own element. It felt right. She was surprised at how good it felt, almost like it was her first time to ever smoke, and that she had discovered something she loved. As the cherry burned down to the filter on the Marlboro she took one last drag and snubbed it out in the ashtray. She noticed on her pointer and index finger a faint yellow stain. She suspected it was a nicotine stain, but she thought only regular smokers could develop those. Perhaps a weekend of binge chain smoking could, but she didn’t know. All she knew was that she had just had some sort of Epiphany about her genuine enjoyment of smoking.
The waitress came by with the plate of scrambled eggs and refilled the cup of coffee. Kelly had a few bites of the eggs, but didn’t feel that hungry, although she swiftly drank most of her second cup of coffee. She had that gnawing feeling, the desire to light up again. She figured to herself, “why not, I seem to like it, what can it hurt?”. She reached for the pack, but found it empty. Fortunately, she had that other unopened fresh pack of Marlboros waiting in her purse. She thought “well, it sure is handy someone left these in here for me.” She opened the pack, and lit a cigarette. She felt incredibly comfortable with the cigarette, as though it was a friend reassuring her that everything would be ok. She dragged longingly on the cigarette, as if she was inhaling the truth one breath at a time. In her mind, some of the fog began to lift. She knew now what she needed to do. She still didn’t know what happened, but she needed to return to the apartment where she had woken up this morning to see who was there. Perhaps whoever lived there would be able to tell her what she had been doing in Arizona this weekend. She slowly nodded her head, as if she was agreeing with someone else’s suggestion and making up her mind. She finished smoking the rest of her cigarette and had another while waiting for the check. Now it was time to start figuring out what had happened.
Kelly got into her Volvo and headed back down the street that she had just come down not quite one hour ago. There was that somewhat familiar looking apartment complex she had left earlier. Uneasily she pulled into the parking garage and found a spot. She was shaking with nervousness, when she looked down and noticed she had again unconsciously lit another cigarette. She smirked at this strange new habit she seemed to have manifested from nowhere. But then she felt a pang of worry in her stomach, concern over this entire bizarre situation. Besides the amnesia, she also wondered deeply how could she become so addicted to cigarettes overnight. Who just wakes up one morning, and discovers they are a chain smoker? She tried to disregard the thought, and she dragged on the cigarette to calm her frayed nerves. She wandered around the apartment complex, looking for an apartment number that she couldn’t remember. She realized how stupid this idea was, but she couldn’t give up just yet. Then she heard something that caught her attention.
“Rose! Hey, where have you been? I got back to my place and you were just gone.” Said a tall handsome man with jet black hair, dressed in slacks and an expensive looking golf shirt.
“Oh…. Sorry… I was …hungry.” Kelly said, trying to conceal her utter confusion and who this strangely familiar person was. He had called her Rose. This couldn’t be coincidence.
“Right, that’s alright. I picked up the donuts and coffee for breakfast, you wanna come back and have some?”
“Uh…. Yeah…” Kelly said, staring both at the man, and past him. She followed him around the corner, and re-entered the spacious apartment she had woken up in this morning. He set the box of donuts on the kitchen table and pulled out a chair for her to sit down in.
“Man, I was worried you had just split again, and I wouldn’t hear from you for another six months, like what happened last time.” The man said, with a friendly impish grin.
“Huh? When was that?” Kelly clearly had a look of concern on her face.
“Well, six months ago silly, after we met at that real estate conference in San Diego… Rose, something’s wrong, you look lost or something. Want some coffee?”
“Right…Sorry, Ive just been feeling weird this morning…. I guess I needed some fresh air or something.” Kelly said, still staring at this man who was treating her with such familiarity.
“Ha! Fresh air? You mean you ran out of cigarettes again and had to go make another midnight run to buy more? I swear, I don’t think Ive ever met anyone who smokes as much as you do. Your like some kind of human chimney or something. What is it? Three packs a day?.”
Kelly looked to notice that yet again she had unknowingly lit a cigarette and had been smoking it.
“Oh… yeah… I guess.” Kelly said as she watched the smoke from the cigarette curl upwards into the air before taking another drag.
“Let me get you an ash tray.” The man got up and went into the bedroom and retrieved one of the full ashtrays that Kelly had seen at the bedside nightstand this morning. He emptied it out in the trash, and set it down in front of her.
“Thanks.” Kelly still seemed uneasy, and distant. She liked this guy, he was very sweet. He was quite handsome, and from the looks of his apartment he was pretty financially successful. She guessed that since he had mentioned a real estate convention in San Diego, that he must also be in that business. Trouble was, she didn’t even remember going to a real estate convention in San Diego, much less meeting this guy there. But why did he think her name was Rose? This was all too weird, but she saw that some of these disjointed pieces were starting to come together, while suggesting yet more strange events that had apparently happened in the past.
“Man, Rose, you are a real space cadet this morning aren’t you?” The man mused, with a friendly smile on his face. “You probably just need some coffee to wake your ass up!”
“Yeah” Kelly feigned a smile.
“Oh, I almost forgot. I got what you wanted when I was out.”
“Uh, what was that again?” Kelly asked, inquisitively. Hoping for another clue.
“The two cartons of cigarettes, silly. That is what you asked for right? I got the right brand didn’t I? Marlboro Reds?” The man reached into a brown grocery bag and produced two cartons of cigarettes.
“Yeah… thanks. I uh…. Definitely needed those.” Kelly said, again trying to fake a smile. This kept getting weirder and weirder.
“Ok good. I’d hate to deprive an unapologetic chain smoker of her necessities.” The man smirked. “Besides, you seem like an easy woman to please. Coffee, donuts and obscene quantities of cigarettes. Most gorgeous blondes with rising careers are quite a bit more demanding.” He smiled again, joking with her.
“Well… you know me…I try to be easy.” Kelly smirked, this time genuinely amused at his good natured jests.
“Oh yeah, and I left your pick up ticket for the dry cleaning over on the kitchen counter. They weren’t open when I went by this morning but they open at 11am on Sundays.”
“Dry cleaning?” Kelly asked, again wondering what he was talking about.
“Your business skirt and blouse you had spilled the pinot noir on Friday night at dinner. Jeez woman, you have the mind of a steel trap don’t you?” He again smiled at Kelly.
“Right, silly me. Thanks.” Kelly said, trying to feign the appearance of remembering what he was talking about.
“Anyways, listen I have to jump in the shower and get cleaned up. I have a ten o’clock tee-time with Rich from Vangaard Realtors, we were going to discuss some business matters while I pretend to let him win.”
“Ok.” Kelly said.
“I’ll be right back. Try not to wander off before I finish my shower.” the man said through a smile, and came by and kissed her sweetly on the cheek.
“I think I can manage that.” Kelly said.
As soon as he got into the shower, and Kelly could hear the water running, she thought about leaving. This was too weird. This guy acted like her knew her really well, but she had no idea who the hell he was. But then she decided to snoop around, maybe check his wallet and find out at least what his name was. She found his wallet on top of the dresser in his bedroom and looked inside. His drivers license said “Mark Walther” and she found several business cards in a sleeve. Apparently he was a real estate broker. She pocketed one of the business cards, since it had both his name and his contact info on there. She looked through the wallet, reading the different cards and such that he had, trying to get a better idea of who this guy who seemed to know her so well really was. Based on his birthday on the license he should be thirty-two. He had several different platinum credit cards, seemed to be a member at five different golf clubs and had several membership cards to different real estate organizations. She thought to herself “Wow, I seem to have landed some kind of dream man. Except that he thinks my name is Rose, and that I don’t know who he is, this seems like a pretty good deal.” Then she heard the water stop in the shower, and she put the wallet back on top of the dresser where she found it and hurried back into the dining room. Trying to look nonchalant, she lit another cigarette for effect and sat on the stylish leather sofa and pretended to read a golf magazine that he had on the coffee table. Shortly he emerged from the bedroom, dressed to play golf with a bag of expensive looking clubs over his shoulder.
“Wow, look who’s still here and still smoking.” Mark said with a friendly grin.
“Surprised? ” Kelly said, playing along feeling strangely comfortable with Mark.
“Only part way. Mainly surprised your still here. Not the least bit surprised to find you smoking on my new couch.”
“Oh, was I not supposed to do that?” Kelly asked, worried that she had committed some faux-pas.
“No, you go ahead smokey. I told you before I don’t mind your chain-smoking at all. If anything I find it kinda hot in that film noir sorta way… Besides, Its just a damn couch. I just hope the next time I hear from you is sooner than six months from now.” Mark said.
“Right. I’ll try to be better about that.” Kelly said, sorta sheepish and embarrassed about apparently completely forgetting about this guy for six months. “Well, you have to go, and I have to get back to Pasadena.”
“Ah, Pasadena. Hopefully you’ll return my calls next time Im up there.” Mark said, again using a smile to diffuse his only half-joking remarks.
“Right, well Ive been a little out of it lately. But I think I will start figuring it out before long. I think I can manage to give you a call this time. At least that’s the plan.” Kelly said, while looking deeply into Mark’s grey eyes.
“Good. I had a great time this weekend and I really do want to keep in touch and I definitely want to see you again.” Mark said, with sincerity in his voice.
“Me too.” Said Kelly, still not quite sure what she was agreeing to. They headed out the door, and Mark handed her the two cartons of cigarettes and the ticket for the dry cleaning
“Its already on my tab, all you have to do is pick it up.” Said Mark helpfully.
“Gee, you don’t have to do that… Mark… I can get it.” Said Kelly, hesitating as she said his name aloud.
“Not at all. I get a good deal from this dry-cleaner because I set him up with a good interest rate on his property. Don’t think anything of it. Besides, the Pinot Noir was my idea so I feel at least partly to blame.” Mark said, with a friendly and comfortable reassurance.
“Thanks.” Said Kelly, weakly and a blushing at his gifts.
Mark headed to his Lexus and Kelly headed to hers, waiving goodbye at Mark as he drove off. The whole episode had been entirely strange. She felt strangely comfortable around him, and he was very charming and funny. Cute too, she thought to herself. Although the fact that he thought her name was Rose was more than a little disturbing. And she still couldn’t get over this episode of amnesia she had for this entire weekend, and apparently had some six months ago. She felt she had some more answers to what had been going on, and more clues. More facts to work with. But she would definitely have to see her psychiatrist about this whole episode. Even if she really did want to call this Mark guy back, she obviously wasn’t in her right mind. She’d have to figure out what was going on inside her head. Maybe she had gone crazy. Something was definitely not right about the whole situation. Even so, she knew she needed to get back to Pasadena. She’d have to find this dry cleaners business on her way out of town, and then hit the highway back to California. As she reached for the keys to her car, she noticed that once again, she had lit a cigarette while lost in thought. She smiled, and sighed exhaling a long plume of smoke through her nose. Apparently this overnight addiction was around to stay.
